Friday, January 1, 1999

Lotusphere, PowerBoards, and me


By David Gewirtz

As I write this (space heater raising the temperature of my pants leg to a rosy 102 degrees) outside it's less than 30 degrees. The wind chill factor makes it seem like minus eight. As I write this, I'm thinking of you. You, who will be going to Lotusphere in Orlando. Orlando, where, while I'm freezing my personal post processor, you'll be complaining that it's 50 or 60 degrees -- too cold for swimming, yet comfortably "baseball jacket" weather.

No, I'm not bitter. I'm not bitter that I'm the top dog, the head banana, the big cheese and yet I don't get to go to Lotusphere. No way. I'm not bitter that my esteemed colleagues, managing editor Denise Amrich and associate editor for business partner relations Donna Rose somehow managed to get to Disneyland or world or whatever while I'm shoveling snow. Oh no. I'm not even bitter that it was my brilliant idea. Mine. I suggested that Donna should go because It's her job to deal with the business partners and Denise should go because she needs to work with the authors. I was deluded. But in my deluded mind, I thought I was less than necessary since all I would do is shake hands, give speeches, and help the loyal masses feel honored to meet the famous David Gewirtz. In other words, I was expendable.

I'm not even bitter that, in part, I chose to stay here in frigid New Jersey because Heather begged me not to leave her stuck in the office all alone for a week with Steve. And I'm not bitter that Denise thinks I'd bitch and moan even if I did get to go (you know, too long waiting for the plane, too many people at Disneyplace, too much cheerfulness before noon, and so forth). Ok, so last year I threatened to behead Mickey when he called me bright and happy for a 6am wake-up call. Oh no. I'm not even slightly bitter. I'm going to enjoy my dull, boring week of driving to work each day while they while away their time at the Beacon Awards dinner and Waterworld or Fishland or whatever they call that Seaworld place.

Brrr. And I'm not even bitter that I don't get to see all the cool Notes and Domino goodies and meet all my nice Notes and Domino friends. No. Not bitter at all.

Do you know why I'm not bitter? Seat heaters. Yepper. I done got me some seat heaters for my new all-wheel drive. My butt's warm and so's my heart.

Well, OK, seriously -- I'm not bitter at all. For a long time I've been trying to effect the transition from "a company with an innovative founder" to an "innovative company". I've been trying to create a business where the company grows as a result of everyone's efforts and is not bottlenecked by the limited hours available in my day.